What is Love Anyway?

Throughout the ages, many have asked this question and most of us would agree that there are several different kinds of love. It comes in many shapes and sizes, colors and textures. The ancient Greeks named seven types of love:

Eros-sexual desire, passionate love, most akin to our modern notion of romantic love.

Philia-friendship, platonic love.

Ludus-playful, flirtatious, uncommitted love.

Pragma-lasting love between a married couple, requiring the understanding of lovers who have been together for a long time (www.thoughtcatalog.com).

Agape-selfless, unconditional, altruistic love. Referred to as charity by Christians. It’s the love of humanity and of God. Many recent studies have linked altruism with better mental and physical health as well as longevity (Neel Burton, www.psychologytoday.com).

Philautia-love of self, divided into two kinds: the selfish kind seeking pleasure and attention and the healthy kind we refer to as self-esteem.

Storge-familial love like the kind between a parent and child.

But what is real love? Love is an action word and I’m not the only one who thinks so. The Hebrew word for love is ahavah, built upon the root consonants h-v, meaning “to give” (www.Chabad.org). It must be given to be real.

Love is arguably the most important thing in life and what we should most strive for, but, like all good things, it comes at a price. The truest forms of love require sacrifice; sacrifice of time; of self; and sometimes everything we have. Sometimes it requires sacrificing our lives like when soldiers lay down their lives for their country which is something I’m thinking about today on Veteran’s Day. Sometimes even more than that as in the case of Jesus Christ atoning for our sins by giving his life on the cross and taking our sins upon himself in the Garden of Gethsemane. Sacrifice elevates our love to the highest form.

In all three of the books in the Secret Haven series, love and sacrifice is a recurrent theme. When Laura tells Nick about how she sacrificed going to college out West in order to stay home and care for her sick mother, he says:

“That was a good thing you did though, sacrificing what you really wanted to do to take care of your mom. You’re a really good person, Laura. Family is important, more important than our dreams sometimes, don’t you think?”

What do you think?